Tuesday, January 14, 2014


Fashion is so difficult to write about because I have too much to say.  As a former Bergdorf Goodman Personal Shopper and Stylist, I have certainly earned my stripes, as well as my opinion.  On that note, I need a seat on E's Fashion Police not only to vent, but simply to police the police.  How in the world did the tackiest, most ostentatious celebrities become the fashion police?  They should all be arrested and held on charges of fashion injustice 911.

Now that I got that off my chest, I will keep it short but sweet.  The following is a list of my favorite fashion hits and misses and why. Enjoy!

These photos serve little justice!  I'm not sure which "little number" was hotter, her or her dress!  Stunning in a plunging neckline, sleeveless white gown with emerald green embellishment, and emerald green silk stilettos, Margot Robbie made The Emerald City look cheap.  Total package!!!!

Cate Blanchett/Armani Prive

The Queen Mum of the Red Carpet, Cate Blanchett, in Armani Prive, deserves a golden septet, not a golden globe.  From head to toe, her regal appearance stole the show!

Lupita Nyong'o/Ralph Lauren

Lupita Nyong'o wearing Ralph Lauren, should have rode in side saddle with Prince Charming.  Simple yet elegant, this clean lined citrus gown made a bold statement!

Elizabeth Moss (J Mendel)
The more I looked, the more I liked!  Elizabeth Moss in J Mendel was a statue of Art Deco elegance.  The Empire State Building should look so good.  I must say though, it was all about the dress not the mess, her hair that is.  The detail on this gown close up made my heart sing.  Zoom in and look see!!

Zoe Saldana (Prabal Gurung)
Joan Rivers called it "patchwork," I call it "hot mess."  It's as if she forgot she was invited last minute and sewed together every rag in a San Juan sweat shop!  BIGGEST MISS EVER!!!!!!

Tina Fey (Carolina Herrera)
Really Tina Fey?  I know your forte is comedy, but this is a joke!!  Sad part is, this time the jokes on you!!!

Drew Barrymore (Monique Lhullier)

Hmmm, Julia Goulia?  This dress looks awfully familiar.  Baby bump or no baby bump Drew, the "bud" in your oven was enough. This weeping willow was a "Sheer" disaster!
Julia Roberts (Dolce & Gabanna)
All the money and fame Julia and this is what you show up in to the Golden Globes?  My father could have worn this dress better in his grave.  Sorry Daddy, or should I say, Sorry Julia? 
Heidi Klum (Marchesa)
How does a fashion master become a fashion disaster?  Clearly Heidi Klum could not decide between her hair, her necklace or her dress!  Ugh!  I can't look.  A patterned dress should NEVER, under any circumstance be paired with a necklace, nevertheless with straps, Fashion rule no. 1!!!  To add insult to injury, she wore her hair down!  Too much going on!  "Less is more before you leave the door!" (Jamie Gottschall).  I need a transfusion for my utter confusion!!!!!
Paula Patton (Stephanie Roland)
White trash has a new name!  Paula Patton wore hers on her sleeve!!  Thank God for her beauty an physique, because this dress takes the cake for the word unique!!!!
Jennifer Lawrence/Christian Dior
While we are on the topic of cake, this is a Barbie Cake Wannabe, honestly!  The black lines draw the eye to those areas, the earrings take you somewhere else and then the hair to another place, I think I'm in space?  It's all too much!  I'm completely overwhelmed. Besides the gown not being the most attractive, I think what every critic is failing to realize is that if her "cute cut" was not this greasy blonde, she wouldn't have totally bombed!  She looks washed out between the light dress, light skin and light hair.  The dress has volume so the jewelry shouldn't!  Who let the dogs out?
Jamie Gottschall
The NYClifestylist

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